Letter to Hotaru
by WC MF inc
Summary: Havik writes Hotaru, Hotaru writes Havik back. Thats about it. Do not even bother reading if you've not played Deception.
1. Chapter 1

Hotaru is a nut. He has a rubber butt. And every time he moves it goes tut-tut. 

LA LA LA LA LA LA LA! TODAY IS SUNDAY TOMORROW IS MONDAY!

He he he he he he he he he heh eeeehhhhhhh? ello weiros of the OrderRealm. We will kill you all!

You suck!

Chaos Rules!

All hail Havik! Chant, my puppets! Chant: Hav-vik! Hav-vik! Hav-vik! Hav-vik!

-signed HAVIK!

p.s.: hotaru suckz, HAVIK RULES!

* * *

Reply: from Seido, realm of the order

We must inform you, sir Havik, that further intevention on your behalf in Seido, will cause us to once again invade your disorganized realm, please keep your offbeat comments and unplanned mail to yourself. If you wish to converse with our people, please plan ahead to do so. We wish no more spontainuos battles or riots in Seido.

Sincerely,  
Hotaru


	2. Chapter 2

Reply from Sir Havik(or Kabal)

From Kabal, speaking no behalf of "Sir" Havik.

Sir Havik says that his offbeat comments are better than your completely organized garbage crap stuff.

I will dig my hookswords into your (thiss iss Kabal sspeaking)flesh if you pursue us any more.

SIGNED: Havik, the most wonderful man to ever step out of Choas Realm, who shall now be refered to as 'Sir Hanik', and Kabal, the slightly saner Black Dragon

p.s.: MAY CHAOS BREAK THE RULES THAT BIND

* * *

Reply from: Hotaru- personaly. 

I really must insist that you no longer side track us in your spontainous behavior. Sir Havik, and Mister Kabal, we are no longer soley focused on your unplanned attacks, I am personally involved in the control of Outworld. Trying to provide order to both ChaosRealm, and Outworlds unstable inviroments. This is just so we can know in advanced that some of my best troops are being sent to ChaosRealm, and Outworld on Thursday of next week.

Sincerely Hotaru, emperor of Lei Chen,OW.


	3. Chapter 3

From Sir Havik and Mister Kabal.

Mister Kabal does not wish to be called Mister Kabal. So continue to do so.

I can have twice that number of troops prepared to attack all of your troops on the Thursday of next week, so we will kill all of you. be sure to be present.

Mister Kabal also says that I am a crazed lunatic who needs a brain scan. I consider that a VERY nice compliment. Thank you, Mister Kabal.

Ps, We will also send troops to Lei Chen, Outworld in order to make the realm even more chaotic.

SIGNED: who says I my finshed?

SIGNED: my name is Sir HAVIK OF CHAOSREALM. I AM SO MUCH BETTER THAN YOU.

And also: Mister Kabal.

MAY CHAOS BREAK THE RULES THAT BIND

* * *

From Hotaru

I grow impatient with you. Sir Havik why must you insist on destroying all that you touch? In my vision I will unite all realms in the name of order. None of this foolishness of freedom, freedom leads to protest, protest leads to anger, anger leads to hate, and hate leads to anarchy. We shall one day overtake your realm much like we overtook your reisistance. Darrius has been impriosned.

Sincerely Hotaru


	4. Chapter 4

From: Sir Havik and Mister Kabal

We already know Darrius has been captured. We plan to do nothing.

You will not unite all realms in the name of the ORDER! the order sucks! All hail Chaos(and me, Sir Havik)!

By the way, your vision sucks too.

I loved your last note. All those fun things in it! You mentioned some of my favoritewordshowfun! I must do that again. itissohardtoreaditslikechaosonpaper!maybeishallwritelikethisfromnowon!

Mister Kabal says that is to hard for you to read and you will not write any more letters to us(oh no). Mister Kabal says read this carefully: HOTARU IS AN IDOIT!

He he he he he heeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

Unpredictability is veery nice. Those two e's in very is very nice.

Mister Kabal says that I need to shut up and send the letter already.

SIGNED: Sir Havik and Mister Kabal(I am still the better one)

P.s.: I really don't have anything to say but this, Sir Havik, Sir Havik, Sir Havik. I rule all because I am Sir Havik, Sir Havik, Sir Havik!

MAY CHAOS BREAK THE RULES THAT BIND

* * *

Reply from, Hotaru

You have lied! How distasteful. After your last reply, I saw no need to further the guards at our prison, but soon after Darrius was freed, by two known associates of Mister Kabal's Black Dragon Clan. A woman known as Kira, and a young, brash man by the name of Kobra. He broke out then proceeded to cause riots, until they escaped the Seidon Guardsmen. We have now listed them as known felons any association with the two is now an offense punishable by death. Prepare to have order imposed on your land, this is your final warning Sir Havik.

Sincerely,  
Hotaru.


	5. Chapter 5

From: Sir Havik and Mister Kabal

We lied. Wasn't that very chaotic? Hahahahahaha!

By the way, Hotaru, Kobra says "Screw you!"

And am I listed as a felon too? you could tell me now that I asked, but that would not be unpredictable and chaotic. So just forget about this whole paragraph.

I agree with Mister Kabal. He just said that you are a buffalo-futt! Actually that was my wording, but better than his cuz buffalo-futts don't really exist. (Except in the case of you, you big buffalo-futt).

I also liked your sentence fragments. Like Sentence fragment. Gordy's hand. Bob is. Mister Kabal. Bite. Eat. Dig. Hat's are. Hotaru is a giant buffalo-futt resting on a buffalo's butt!

This is not "Sir" Havik any longer. I am Kabal(mister kabal). And I am most impressed with the Black Dragon's performance. Most impressive.

SIGNED: "Sir" Havik,Mister Kabal, and Kobra

p.s.: "Sir" Havik says Kobra said Screw you! again.

MAY CHAOS BREAK THE RULES THAT BIND.

* * *

REPLY FROM HOTARU

Dear Sir. Havik, Mister Kabal and Young Master Kobra

I must insist that you criminals stop writting to me and my realm. The next sentence is very angry it's only fair to warn you that I am about to do something not entirely appropriate.

**WE DO NOT WISH TO BE BOTHERED BY YOU ANYMORE.**

I'd also like to inform you that you Sir. Havik are the number one most wanted in the real of Seido, with Darrius, Mister Kabal, Dairou, Young Master Kobra, and the female Kira also at the top.

Also refrain from using the word "buffalo futt" as it does not actually exsist.

sincerly,

Hotaru.

****


	6. Chapter 6

From: Sir Havik and Mister Kabal

Ooo...SCARY! We are ignoring your directions by bothering you some more.

Mister Kabal is wondering why I am continuing to talk to you after we proved that your armies aren't no good by beating them again and making them prove that they suck. Don't you love bad grammer? I spelled grammar with an e. Is your head spinning now, my pretty?

Mister Kabal thinks I am an idiot, just like you. I am insulted being compared to you, yet insult is the greatest form of complement. This is a very complex situation, yet I am sure of what it means. Heheheheheheeeeeee...Wait! Don't write that! Stop writing everything I say!

Annoying Mister Kabal is very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very fun.

Oh! Listen to this! It's 1980's EarthRealm rock music that we bought here last week! ChaosRealm is so choatic that it's two decades behind EarthRealm time! Hehehehe!

Cum on feel the noize! Girls rock your boys! We'll get wild, wild, wild! Wild, wild, wild!

So you think I got an evil mind, I'll tell you honey  
I don't know why  
I don't know why  
So you think my singing's out of time, it makes me money  
I don't know why  
I don't know why  
Anymore  
Oh no

Mister Kabal has turned off our music, smashed the CD into rubble, and thrown it off one of our many cliffs and hedges. Isn't that a weird thing to have on the same thing? But we do grow our hedges on the edges of our cliffs.

Signed: Screw you guys, I am going home.

Signed: Bob, the Almighty Swiffer Man!

Signed: Sir Havik and Mister Kabal

* * *

From Seido The Realm of Order

Hotaru:

Sir Havik I thoughtI told youI did not want you bothering us anymore. Yet you write more and more and more, and with bad grammar too. It deeply upsets me to see this.

Mister Kabal is a most annoying man, please keep him away from me, or I will be forced to take action on you once again. And my armies are highly trained, your band of hooligans are just lucky, we will attack again next Friday at 12:17 pm. I just thought it was fair to warn you of our attack.

Also stop sending your obnoxious 1980's rock music away from us, we are still in the 1960's here observe this classic peacful song, not like your annoying angry driving beats.

SHE LOVES YOU YEAH, YEAH, YEAH  
SHE LOVES YOU YEAH, YEAH, YEAH  
SHE LOVES YOU YEAH, YEAH, YEAH, YEAH

YOU THINK YOU´VE LOST YOUR LOVE  
WELL I SAW HER YESTERDAY  
IT´S YOU SHE´S THINKING OF  
AND SHE TOLD ME WHAT TO SAY

See isn't that much better? I think it is.

signed..

Hotaru


End file.
